When my husband with Parkinson’s disease visits the dentist they hurt him.
For a while, he complained of persistent pain in his molar. I advised him to go to the dentist. He followed my advice, and the dentist extracted the tooth. Back home, he told me that it took them an hour, and the tooth had broken. They had to cut the tooth into pieces to remove it. Initially, I thought it was a joke because he relayed the information so casually. But I was shocked. It sounded like too drastic a procedure, with a rough approach. I forgot that, due to his Parkinsonism and dementia, he sometimes responds slowly and struggles with words. When it dawned on me, it made me concerned.
I asked him if they offered anything for pain or possible bleeding. He told him to leave it alone and it would heal. If not, he had to return. I was surprised that after such a painful dentist consult no follow-up had been agreed upon. Still, I trusted their judgment and continued with my activities.
On a Sunday, 10 days later, we planned a day trip. but then my husband complained again about it. So instead of a day out, we rushed to the weekend dentist.
My husband wanted to inform his regular dentist about the emergency dentist visit and called for an appointment. I asked if it was for a follow-up or discussion, as a phone consultation was also possible. I didn’t want another expensive consultation. Consequently, I decided to send an email detailing the emergency dentist’s treatment and my husband’s condition after the tooth extraction by our regular dentist. I emphasized my dissatisfaction with the aftercare, given the intensity of the treatment and the fact that the tooth was cut into pieces.
The letter went to the dental assistant, who forwarded it to the dentist. She called me to inquire about the situation. I shared my story and voiced my grievances. She downplayed it and promised to call me next time for better communication. She also said that if my husband wanted to come in, he could always make an appointment. That sounded hopeful, I thought at the time!
On a Friday, just before the weekend, my husband complained again about pain. He called his dentist at 11:00 AM (near closing time). Due to his Parkinsonism, which causes him to speak slowly and struggle with words, I took over the phone call. The dental assistant mentioned that they closed at noon, and the waiting room was full. I reminded her that I was told my husband could come in if necessary. And my husband had to go to the dentist because I didn’t want to go in a hurry again to the weekend dentist. Whether she liked it or not. Now for the third time. The wound was cleaned, and he was prescribed an antibiotic. Everything seemed okay so far, and we traveled on Sunday for the funeral on Monday.
Wednesday, after our return, the pain started again. We had to make another appointment with his dentist. He called, but the connection was repeatedly cut off as if the assistant hung up. He tried again, but the call was cut off each time. My husband told me this happened every time he called the dentist. He tried again while I was present, and it happened the same way. Then we were called back by the dental assistant, but again, the connection was cut off. We now suspect that it’s not a coincidence but intentional, a form of harassment.
Without hesitation, I called another dentist, requesting an appointment for my husband’s tooth treatment, as his regular dentist refused to help. I explained that I suspected they were fed up with us due to my husband’s Parkinsonism and dementia issues. I also asked if this new dentist could obtain my husband’s details over the phone, as the assistant from the previous practice hung up when we called.
They did that. Later, my old dentist called me to inquire about what was going on. She denied hanging up when we called. Instead, she apologized for her assistant’s rude behavior two weeks ago. It seemed more like she wanted to bring me to my knees, making me apologize for my assertive attitude. She made me feel that she had the power to toy with us, and we were dependent on her fantastic expertise as a dentist.
In response, I stated that my husband no longer trusted them and didn’t want to return and that I had found another dentist for him. I announced that I was switching to the new dentist with him.
When I asked to have my records sent to our new dentist, the email hadn’t been received. I also discovered that my dentist appointment scheduled for April was still on the agenda. This confirmed my suspicions. Without hesitation, I decided to leave this Kafkaesque.